Saturday, May 17, 2008

NayNay Didn't Like This Much

I really am at a crossroads where people I have loved and hated and fought with and shared the most important moments with are sick unto death. My charming, cantankerous, loving, hateful, incredibly thoughtful sister-in-law is having a hell of a time trying to survive an open heart surgery repair of an aortic aneurysm, repair of a botched breastbone followed quickly by a massive stroke in the right hemisphere. She has been getting her affairs in order openly and subtly since she found out about the aneurysm. That particular surgery went well, but her carotid artery threw her for a loop. I am sure that last trip home was a quiet farewell, we had recently repaired our most recent personal break because I could not stand not being able to share the intense joy of her having a grandson with her, but I had reentered the relationship with caution. limits.
One of the most remarkable things she ever did, and it is such a Trudi thing to do, was to join me with my sister when my sister's youngest child had been murdered. Trudi had lost her first born to cancer and she rushed to Elaine's side to be with her and it meant so much to my sister, because, though we can lose nieces, they are not our actual children(though we may feel like they are), so Trudi's loss made her sympathy, empathy, and caring more meaningful.

I am spending this day imagining a golden light around Trudi and Elizabeth whatever the answer is.

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